In the morning, reading on a cloudy day
There are so few stories fit to print.
Sitting quietly with uneasy news,
The United States will sink in the Gulf of America.
They’re selling tickets with lovely beach views.

The nursing home lawyers whine in court,
It’s impossible to meet the minimum staff rules!
There’s not enough talent to fill the roles.
Don’t you see your honor,
These regs will shoot our profits full of holes.

There’s a new Federal prosecutor in town,
Nicely dressed with Louboutin shoes.
No more sanctuary cities is the mission!
She dropped the FJB necklace for a crucifix,
Well at least her shoes are Christian.

In Margate town they went for Trump,
But the money’s been taken back.
Getting this efficiency sure is swell,
But Lucy can’t get the new heater,
And all we get is a musky smell.

A mayor gets the prize for storied pomp,
We can’t have these people downtown!
The tired poor fed by Jon and Dorothea,
Living on a prayer in Tom’s River.
That mayor would complain about Joseph of Arithemea.

Pickle ball courts are what we need!
There’s no sanctuary for the homeless.
Protecting the quality of life, it’s plain,
And that old church in town will learn
The power of eminent domain.

In the morning on a cloudy day
Got to turn to business and entertainment.
Egg prices up, the producers have lined pockets,
In sparkly, shining dresses
Lauren invited friends to ride her man’s rocket.

Sitting quietly with the uneasy news
There are so few stories fit to print
Turn to the comics for some fun,
The horoscope prods towards self-improvement.
Time to plant the Liberation Day Garden.